Not to brag or anything, but CLJ Jones high has one of the best varsity cheerleading squads in the state. And while it’s true that BlueBell, like any Southern town, loves its football, they also love their cheerleaders! At every game, the crowd makes sure to get their food and whatnot while the marching band performs (sorry, band geeks, but playing Lil’ Wayne isn’t going to change the natural social order) so they won’t miss our halftime numbers.
Because seriously, we are known for putting on a killer show! Cheerleading is a majorly grueling sport. You need strength, flexibility, athleticism, dance skills, and teamwork. (Not to mention it helps a lot if you’re pretty. And cheerful.) There are tons of places where things can go wrong, especially in advanced routines like ours. I mean, it’s a miracle more cheerleaders aren’t breaking bones like every day. So last night, after the awesome dance portion of our set – to this rad mashup of Rihanna and Miranda Lambert – we transitioned into our jump sequence. We worked so hard at cheer camp to get our front hurdler-pike-side hurdlers perfectly in sync, and Kelsey Van Horn’s legs were finally as high as the rest of the squad’s. Everyone was super into it. Obvs! Then we went into our signature move – pendulums into twisting arabesques into an Alabama Slammer Handstand Split-and-Spin pyramid with toe-touch cradle dismounts – which had the crowd going wild.
After that, we were in the home stretch. Ashley Percy and Harper Shamblin did their double back handsprings, which led into our roll off extensions. Natasha Coleman and I threw Becky Perry into a simple basket toss, and… I don’t know what went wrong… But when Becky dropped into our arms and we popped her out onto her feet, we musta tossed her a little too hard or something, and gravity like slammed our heads together – hard. Natasha’s a mouth-breather (it’s allergy season and she’s got a deviated septum and her mom won’t let her get a nose job ‘til she’s 18), which is only important because when her face collided with mine she accidentally bit my cheek! I was stunned. And not just ‘cause we gave each other mild concussions. But on the bright side, Becky landed on her feet, and all three of us finished the routine… In unison with the rest of our squad.
The clip’s already on YouTube (don’t even think I’m telling ya’ll what keywords to enter to find it). But that’s not even the worst part! I have this horrible bite-shaped bruise under my left eye – like Edward Cullen went all “Twilight” on my face (I wish that was the case!) – and there’s no way I can show my hideous face at the party some of the football players are throwing at the lake this weekend. And Colby Slaughter and I were going to take our not-quite relationship to the next level (making out in Cole Maliska’s abandoned shrimp boat, which is only like three steps away from Facebook Official).